Dissociative Identity Disorder

Dissociative identity disorder (previously known as multiple personality disorder) is a fairly common effect of severe trauma during early childhood, usually extreme, repetitive physical, sexual, and/or emotional abuse.

Most of us have experienced mild dissociation, which is like daydreaming or getting lost in the moment while working on a project. However, dissociative identity disorder is a severe form of dissociation, a mental process, which produces a lack of connection in a person's thoughts, memories, feelings, actions, or sense of identity. Dissociative identity disorder is thought to stem from trauma experienced by the person with the disorder. The dissociative aspect is thought to be a coping mechanism -- the person literally dissociates himself from a situation or experience that's too violent, traumatic, or painful to assimilate with his conscious self.

Dissociative identity disorder is characterized by the presence of two or more distinct or split identities or personality states that continually have power over the person's behavior. With dissociative identity disorder, there's also an inability to recall key personal information that is too far-reaching to be explained as mere forgetfulness. With dissociative identity disorder, there are also highly distinct memory variations, which fluctuate with the person's split personality.
The "alters" or different identities have their own age, sex, or race. Each has his or her own postures, gestures, and distinct way of talking. Sometimes the alters are imaginary people; sometimes they are animals. As each personality reveals itself and control's the individuals' behavior and thoughts, it's called "switching." Switching can take seconds to minutes to days. When under hypnosis, the person's different "alters" or identities may be very responsive to the therapist's requests.

There are several main ways in which the psychological processes of dissociative identity disorder change the way a person experiences living, including the following:
Depersonalization. This is a sense of being detached from one's body and is often referred to as an "out-of-body" experience.


Derealization. This is the feeling that the world is not real or looking foggy or far away.
Amnesia. This is the failure to recall significant personal information that is so extensive it cannot be blamed on ordinary forgetfulness. There can also be micro-amnesias where the discussion engaged in is not remembered, or the content of a meaningful conversation is forgotten from one second to the next.
Identity confusion or identity alteration. Both of these involve a sense of confusion about who a person is. An example of identity confusion is when a person sometimes feels a thrill while engaged in an activity (e.g., reckless driving, DUI, alcohol or drug abuse) which at other times would be revolting. In addition to these apparent alterations, the person may experience distortions in time, place, and situation.

When I was first diagnosed with DID, I left....rather RAN away from.....the Therapist I had been seeing for many years. I never returned. I refused to believe that I could ever have such a "label" put upon me! How could she betray the trust we had developed? I was angry! I was...in denial. Now years later, I sought help for Depression, Sleep Deprevation and lost time. My new Therapist (Psycholigist), after treating me for the past 8 months has diagnosed me with DID.

Now that I have accepted this diagnosis, so many things that have happened in my life, are starting to make sense. I can not count the times I have gotten into my car, with a clear destination in mind, only to end up somewhere completely different, with no memory of how I got there. There are clothes in my closet I don't remember buying. There are many "blank" spaces in my childhood memories. Friends will recount stories of things we have done or places we have gone, to which I have no recall. I have been to gatherings and met people, who seem to know me....but I have no memory of who they are, where we met.

More later...............

"Child Abuse casts a shadow the length of a lifetime."