It hurt very much to be a child! Physically and emotionally. We had no outlet for our pain. We were not permitted to show our anger. When anger builds inside, it comes out "sideways", in unhealthy ways, and many times directed at innocent people! We were having some difficult weekends in the past few months. Our anger boiled up and became rage. Anything and everything seemed to be setting it off. We knew if we did not find a way to control it, or a coping mechanism, we may possibly hurt ourselves! Thanks to Therapy, we have now learned that "our" writing does release some of the unresolved anger. It soothes our soul. We know we have a long way to go before we rid ourselves of anger completely, but now we know what to do when it boils up from way down inside....we write!We have been writing off and on since we were children. The Mother never seemed to appreciate our stories....which was hurtful. One time we saw an ad in a magazine. It read something to the effect...Writers Needed...take our quiz and see if you have what it takes to become a Writer. So, we did...take the quiz, sent it off and then thought nothing else about it. We were in 4Th grade at that time. Upon returning home from school, weeks after we had sent the completed quiz off, we saw an unfamiliar car at the "Haunted House". We walked in the door and the Mother gave us that look...we knew we were in trouble. Seated at the kitchen table was a man we had never seen before. Immediate panic set in...what had we done now? Who was this stranger? He was a representative from the Writer's Publication, whose quiz we had filled out and sent away. The Mother introduced the stranger to us. He smiled and said that he did not expect us to be so young! He went on to say how wonderfully we had done on our Writer's quiz and how impressed he was with our writing. We could "feel" this smile wanting to come out and it was so difficult to suppress it. But one glance in the Mother's direction and we knew we had better not smile, if we knew what was good for us. Well the Mother rushed the guy out the door, apologizing for her "daughter" who had wasted his time. The stranger actually ignored the Mother, and turned to us and asked us to walk with him to his car. We glanced at the Mother, who grudgingly said to go on. The stranger told us.....write something everyday, even if it's just a sentence...but never stop writing. He told us we had so much potential and not to allow anyone to tell us any different. We remember the euphoria that day! Someone actually liked our writing! He went on to ask us to contact his publication, when we were older, and we could talk then about our future. Well, of course we never did. Life sometimes gets in the way of the good things that "could" have happened. Another very important reason we continued writing, is due to the encouragement of our High School English/Lit teacher! He was and is an incredible man! He gave us some very unusual assignments...such as...write and essay about going to sleep at night. Think about it....that is pretty unusual. He read ours to the class! We were so proud! When our first Poem was published...we dedicated our accomplishment to him and his encouragement! He called us on the phone and thanked us, saying no one had ever done that for him and how proud he was of us. The last time we saw him was at our Brother's funeral, almost nine years ago. So we did have some "good people" in our lives, growing up. We thank and appreciate them.
Today, we continue writing because we love it and it is helping us heal. Our Journey, towards healing, is a rocky one. Our writing is our crutch, until we can stand on our own, as one.
Sarah~
MElinda - grades 1 through 6
Sueann
"The truth about our childhood is stored up in our body and although we repress it, we can never alter it. Our intellect can be deceived, our feelings manipulated. our perceptions confused and our body tricked with medication. But someday the body will present its bill, for it is as incorruptible as a child who, still whole in spirit, will accept no compromises or excuses, and it will not stop tormenting us until we stop evading the truth".
